Day 3 of 30 Day Challenges
The blog series in which I am completing my challenge from 30dayblogchallenge.com!
As well as a self-made challenge inspired by Abraham Hicks in which I self-soothe myself through negative emotion.
At the end of this 30 day journey I intend to be more fully on my life’s path, “all systems go.”
Well at least I think I am on day 3.
Bit of a hold up on the IT side of my 30 Day Blog Challenge. I don’t even feel the need to self-soothe about it. There is nothing I can do. It’s out of my hands. I am waiting for them to resolve the issue on their end.
But in the meantime I continue my blog writing every day. I want to keep the momentum going. And I continue my 30 Day Self-Soothing Challenge.
I don’t know what the delay will mean for my 30 day schedule. It may just mean that I end up going into extra innings. I just decided that. That’s the way I will self-soothe myself into accepting that the process isn’t going as planned.
I recognize that that can be a hang up for me. I like things to go as planned. But rarely, if ever, do things in life really go as planned. It’s nice to have plans, but important to be flexible as they unfold in unexpected ways. So finding a level of acceptance is often crucial.
Accept, Move On, Time Travel
So, how are you today, ethers of the universe? The internet that is not yet tuned into these writings on a page that isn’t visible? The readers who are not yet reading? How are you today? Personally I am doing well. Less frustration than the last couple days. Resolved some things as well. Moving forward.
It sounds funny to speak to an audience that isn’t there yet. But one idea that is new to me, but not entirely new, is that time as we know it is just a construct. If you were to travel interdimensionally, then the audience to which I am writing is already present now. They will only be reading the posts in real-time some day in the future. Do you follow me?
I love the idea of traveling through time and dimensions. So I write as if I really have readers. And I imagine that some day readers will read these posts. If the movies have anything to say about it, “build it and they will come.” So I build it now, and one day I know they will come. The readers. Not the baseball players. Ahem…
(By the way, if you didn’t get that reference, you are likely much younger than the film I am quoting… Don’t let me tell you, though. Too easy to find out. Google it or something.)
=)
Ahem…
Well, anyways. Come to think of it I did have some opportunity to self-soothe today. I had my two girls for visitation. I hate that idea, “visitation…” I am their father. Why do I have to schedule time to “visit” with my own kids? Anyways, two girls, one almost 5 and the other a year and a half. So plenty of frustration and need to calm myself…
Did I succeed? Not remotely? Is that bad? I don’t think so. Does that undermine my progress, my momentum in self-soothing? I’d like to think not. I hope not, too. I mean, kids test parents constantly. It’s not always easy to keep your cool when they frustrate you in ways you cannot even imagine until it happens…
But come to think of it, here is a chance to change that momentum. So I got frustrated at my kids earlier. At least I didn’t get overly mad, and I did return to calm quicker than I used to. And now I can be easy on myself for all of that soothing I didn’t do today.
Now, tonight as I write, I can remind myself to be easy on my progress. Not to lose sight of my goal. Not to let a bit of frustration that is already said and done reverse the whole thing.
So easy does it. I am here now. I am where I am. A new moment to reclaim myself in soothing and calmness. It’s ok, after all. To parent and to get frustrated. It’s ok to learn as I go. Just as the toddler learns to walk and talk and do all that fun human stuff. I don’t scold my baby for trying. (I do scold her for throwing food all over the floor all day). Why should I scold myself for trying to be a better parent, day by day, as I experience it?
There. That’s my opportunity today. To return to my practice.
What else?
Well, I did make some more progress on my music. Well, I say mine in order to claim my part in it. But I also feel it is not mine, or rather more than just mine. It is the music of the universe. I am serious. I am the channel through which it is being created. But I am not the creator of it, if you follow.
I have always felt I was gifted with the words, the melodies, the drive to pursue it and create the compositions for each song. I have been extremely blessed by the tools and helpers by which I have continued to work on this powerful music.
Piqued your interest? Good. I will leave it as a cliff-hanger for now. Don’t want to give it all away at once. I’m not selling anything. Yet. Though when the songs are complete, I will tell all the world. And I believe all the world will want to know.
Ooh, I can feel your anticipation. My future readers. Future listeners. There is so much power in these words. And in the songs. And in the spirit and energy behind it all. Be patient. I am. Mostly.
And a lot excited.
I thank God for all that happens to me. I thank God for these gifts and these blessings. By the grace of God go I.
More tomorrow. Stay tuned. Future fans. =)
Blessings to you all,
Matthew