EA#17:
Read From the Beginning or the start of Trial Two or Three
The Mountain in the Clouds, Part Twenty
“
It was like a dream within a dream.
Or at least I thought I was dreaming.
I was carried by the light. It lifted me from the tumbling waters of that dark, cold river. It held me in a warm embrace. It hurtled me through the air at an alarming speed. I could feel the night air blowing across my face.
I could not see beyond the light. It was dazzlingly bright. And hot. Not the kind of hot that burns. It felt comfortable.
I dazed in an out of consciousness on this strange flight.
And I awoke in the dark. Alone. But not so alone. There was a lingering feeling of being held, being taken care of, being loved. It felt glorious, in fact.
Then it subsided as I came back to my senses.
I looked around me and there before me was the landscape I knew to expect in the Watermiri Province in which I had lived for so long. I was still far from the city of Ham, I could tell. I was still by the river in which I had fallen. It coursed by me, much gentler here than by the falls where the rapids had taken me.
To my surprise I was not wet at all. It must have been some time since I had been submerged. Or somehow I had been dried off. I couldn’t tell which. But it was still the middle of the night.
A gurgling in my belly told me that I was hungry. That and the urge to relieve my… well, you know… I’d swallowed a lot of water and I guess it was coming back out. The sound of my bladder emptying into the water somehow reminded me of a place I recalled being recently.
Yes! The fountains and flowing waters of the baths in Starhome.
I know, not the most pleasant correlation. But at least I was recalling where I was and why. I was in the middle of my third trial. I was seeking the feeling of joy.
And I was quite sure I was doing a lousy job of it.
Ok, do that inner voice thing. Remind myself that it’s ok. No need to beat myself up. So I had been taken into my past, into painful memories and feelings that I once contended with. That’s not me today. I am stronger. Even the winged people of the city in the mountain in the clouds agreed. They were pleased with my progress in my challenges. I am not the man I used to be.
But there was a nagging feeling. Part of my memory for why I had always felt so… well, why I used to dip so low and think such awful… well, I don’t want to head back down that road. Those memories I relived… gods, how awful… no, I will not use that word to describe it. Sure, that may be a good word for those experiences, but I will not focus on the bad here. They were lessons after all. They have gotten me to the place that I am today.
Still, the feeling I recalled. Why I used to think the world was not right for me. Something vague I’d felt all my life. Now it was coming back to me more clearly. A certainty I had had once or twice, maybe more. This certainty that why I felt so off in my life was for one reason. This reason was that I had always felt there was to be much more for me in life. Like there was something I was waiting for. Something great. Some unknown moment in the future that I could not perceive clearly. Just a feeling of something to come and a desire to get there. And somehow the long journey of life that was leading me to that time, that place I wanted to be but wasn’t even clear on… the long life and challenge to reach that goal was making me feel worse for the disconnect of it.
Yes, the disconnect of it. Something about being disconnected… from… I don’t know. For many years I did not believe in magic. I did not believe the gods were real. They didn’t seem to do what I imagined they should for me. There was too much doubt in me.
And I felt disconnected from myself somehow. Disconnected from my own true purpose, my own true nature. Disconnected from some concept of who and what I could be if only I knew how, when, and where and could make it manifest in my own creation.
Wow. I almost couldn’t believe this line of thinking. Sure, Jaran had taught me many things. And I had found my own teachings in my own ways. And I learned more and more to trust this inner voice that soothed and guided me. But this felt like a profound revelation.
Yet still, I had no answer to my yearning. I still had yet to see the result of this feeling of wanting more. But I knew that I was in a better place than ever to stem off the feeling of disconnect. Because something had happened to me. No, many things had. Things that convinced me that the gods were real and that I was being helped in my life. Even this feeling that I just had, this warm, loving light that had surrounded me…
Wait! It came back to me. I had been here before. I was saved in that river all those years ago. I never knew by who or what. In fact the memory had been so vague and dreamlike that I must have dismissed it and forgotten it. This was something real that had happened to me!
Then what came next? I think I was in quite a daze at that time in my life. I really don’t recall…
But my belly again urged me to find some sustenance. So I began seeking. I could mull over my thoughts all I want, but first things first my body needed to be taken care of.
I began walking and followed the river for some time, not sure if it would take me anywhere I needed to go but trusting that people do tend to flock to water. Most towns and cities are built by water, whether river or sea. And I couldn’t go back to Ham. So I decided that I would head west towards the Elgan Sea.
And as I passed the next grove of trees, I saw it. I was on top of a huge hill that opened from the woods and sprawled downwards for some miles. In the distance the land seemed to end, but the moon shone off the waters and I could tell that I was much closer to my destination than I could have imagined. The Elgan Sea!
To the south I could perceive the glimmer of lights in the distance. A lot of lights, maybe hundreds, shining forth from the tops of tall buildings. They emanated from a walled structured. I couldn’t make out much detail, but the construction was massive and expansive.
I can’t believe it, I thought. That’s Watermire City! The famous port by the seas. I had heard much of the city but never visited. It was said that it sprawled over a vast channel of water between two seas, the Elgan to the north and the Inner Seas to the south. Watermire was renowned for its intense international commerce and its unmatched navy.
‘Well, I don’t see another way about it,’ I mumbled aloud to myself, thinking: I guess I’m going to eat in Watermire tonight.
I trekked my way down the hill and across the open fields of grass towards the great city, all the while trying to ignore the growing pain of hunger residing in my gut.
“
Read the conclusion of our hero’s trial of joy next time, at my Epic Adventures page!
Thanks so much for reading.
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Blessings to you,
Matthew