EA#45:
Read From the Beginning or the start of Trial Two or Three or Four or Five or Six or Seven
The Mountain in the Clouds, Part Forty-Eight
“
The zombies encroached from all sides.
Even with my two giant allies, it seemed there was no way out for us.
The moaning and grunting and gurgling sounds were so disturbing, it made my stomach sick.
Especially terrifying were the two giant zombies who came in from each side.
What could we do?
Gumpelthwomp and Giggazzibar stood back to back, determined to hold on as long as they could for each other. I was in Gumpel’s hand, and while I was above the crowd of monsters, I felt no sense of safety. Any moment the beasts would be upon us. Their gnashing teeth made me shudder, and the real worry that they might chew upon my live body made me want to vomit.
Why had I gotten myself here, again?
I had helped my friend find his love, but now we will all pay the ultimate price for it.
And I never did find my own true love, Maniea. Where could she be? Was she still waiting for me?
Gods how I wished to see her.
And how I wished to get out of this castle of undead.
“Huzzah!” someone called out.
In the air above us flashed a ball of light. It sparked and sputtered, then out of nowhere flew the most beautiful creature I’d ever laid eyes upon.
It was a phoenix, a mythical bird whose feathers were like flames. Its red-orange pattern was brilliant and rich. Its wings spanned near the length of the bailey. Its beautiful tail whipped behind it like a serpent on fire. Its eyes were keen and looked right at me with a knowing smile behind them.
The majestic firebird circled the grounds once, and on the second round swooped down in a huge arc. The flames of its being burned swaths of destruction among the zombie horde. The undead bodies were set fire and reeled about in undying agony. I can imagine that they don’t feel pain, but they responded as if they knew they were finished. The burning corpses, stinking the air with fumes, easily and quickly dissipated into piles of ash in that blazing, life-saving phoenix fire.
The zombie giants, too, caught ablaze, though they burned for far longer. Their legs and knees collapsed first, and their hulking torsos hit the ground with a loud thud. As they fell upon their faces on the ground near us, I noticed Gumpel and Gigga expressing their sorrow to see such tragedy for their kin. I, too, was horrified at the whole proceeding of watching the zombies, who were once men, die in this way. But I’d much rather they were set free of the undead curse then live on in torture. And also much happier that I not follow in their suffering.
It was not long until all the zombies were defeated. Our phoenix savior cried out once for victory and flew out of that broken castle towards the floating landscape outside. We did not hesitate to follow and leave that cursed placed behind.
Stomping back down the hill we had prior come up, Gumpel, Gigga and I watched the phoenix fly ahead of us with grace and dignity. I felt truly blessed to have met such a magnificent creature, and truly grateful to have been spared that terrible fate that was moments ago so imminent.
The mythic firebird called again with a shrieking sound that resonated throughout the vast realm of floating rocks and waterfalls. The creature hung in the air a moment, then flew in small circles, once, twice, three times. Then it burst into a huge fireball that consumed its entire body in just a brief moment of time. Not a trace of it was left but the ashes that fell from the air and landed in a pile upon the ground.
“No!” I called out. Then I remembered something. “Gumpel, take us closer.”
My friend obliged and we walked over to what was left of the great creature. Gumpelthwomp put me down on the ground and I walked tentatively towards the ashes, peering inquisitively towards the middle.
There it was! I saw the baby, dusting off the ashes of its former incarnation. What a sight to behold. The phoenix that burns away its form in fire, only to be reborn from the ashes. What a metaphor, too. It made me think a little about my trials and my ascension process. In many ways it felt as though I had had to burn away aspects of my old self. But unlike the clear example of the phoenix, I could not tell if I were at the stage just prior to exploding in a fireball, or if I was yet in the rebirth after all is said and done.
An inner hunch told me that I was on the cusp of the renewal, not yet ready for my new form.
I suppose I am about to burst, in that case.
You would be correct, the voice of the gods announced within and without.
And then the heart of the maze, the Hermit, approached from behind me and continued to speak: “You are not yet reborn. But you are about to alight. Does this comfort you, or worry you?”
I spoke thus, “I suppose some of both. I have been applying myself to this ascension process for some time now, I’m not sure how long, and I am excited and a bit curious to see what the end result is. But at the same time there is a level of apprehension about what it truly entails. What happens to me? Who will I be? What will be required of me after this is done? Where do I go from here? There are so many unknowns, so many unanswered questions.”
“Ah, yes,” said the Hermit. “These are valid perspectives from where you are. But if you could truly see things from where I am, from where WE are, those who are already what you would call ‘ascended,’ you would not have fear. You would know it as a glorious evolution in your being, your consciousness, and your expression. You would know it as a great expansion of awareness and love and acceptance. And you would know great wisdom and truth and peace. Do these things not sound comforting to you?”
“They do indeed,” I answered.
“Then why do you hesitate so? Why do you hold yourself back?” the Hermit wrinkled his face at me.
“Hold myself back?” I said, surprised. “What do you mean? I thought I had to complete these trials. I am not holding myself back. I am waiting to complete the process that Angie set me on to begin with.”
“Ah, but is this not holding yourself back?” the Hermit smiled knowingly. “You have made the decision that there MUST be a process to get there and so you have enacted a series of steps in order to do so. Little did you know that simply your decision TO ascend was enough. Do you remember when you made that decision? We do.”
“I don’t know,” I tried to remember. “I think it may have been that first night I met Jaran. I don’t know even know what it was. Something about that interaction stirred something deep within. An awakening of some sort. Like there was more to do and to be than I had ever known. But I don’t think I was quite conscious of that until now.”
“You are right on both accounts,” offered the Hermit lovingly. “What happened that day was that Jaran was simply present as who and what he is, ascended in his being, and as his energy field influenced your own, your soul went into agreement with it on some level. Not a conscious level, as you said, you were not conscious of it, but you could say that you were SUPERconscious of it. In other words, your inner being said ‘yes’ to the energy it felt that day and made the choice to follow Jaran into the real potential to be ascended. Now let us clarify something. There is no end to ascension, there is always more to become and to evolve into. But you wished to be more than you were then, and you chose. And it was only after the process you CHOSE to put yourself though in order to ascend that called to you the specific events and timings and experiences that you needed to fully understand the decision you made all those years ago. Do you understand this?”
“Yes, and no,” I said. “I understand WHAT you are saying, but some of it still doesn’t add up. I don’t remember choosing to go to Starhome and meet Angie and begin the ascension process. Jaran offered me a chance to go somewhere that day. And without knowing where, I decided to give it a go. And Angie asked if I would accept the trials. Without knowing why, I decided to try and see what would happen. But I never recall making the conscious choice to get to this moment, this day, this conversation.”
The Hermit shook his and and laughed. “You are funny. You are simultaneously talking yourself into and out of your own your understanding of your ascension. You have been doing it all along. And you make such excuses. You try to understand every nuance. And yet you have answered your own question. As inherently, all questions themselves contain the answer. If only you were to turn it upside down you would see. You have said that you did not choose to get here, but you just said you “gave it a go,” and “decided to try.” These are the decisions you made, the results of which you COULD NOT HAVE known until you went through them fully. And here you are anyways. Finding the results of your decisions. Did you think you needed to know the whole journey in advance? What would be the use in telling the story if you knew the end? Do you yet know the end? Is there an end?”
“Hermit, good sir,” I felt overwhelmed and not sure what to say. “I see your points, most clearly. I suppose I did make the choices. And I could not know every step of the journey in advance. Who does, after all? What a silly notion to even entertain.”
“You will find that the more you ascend and expand, the more you are going to have to become comfortable with the unknown,” the Hermit interjected. “To most minds this is frightening, is it not? The unknown? To change without knowing where to or into what?”
“Yes, it does seem like it could be frightening,” I agreed. “I have already faced so many unknowns. And I am here today, having learned so much. I suppose I can accept more unknowns in the future.”
“Good. So is this the end?” the old man I’d met so long ago in the labyrinth asked me again. “Do you know what the end even is?”
“I don’t think this is the end,” I said solemnly. “I’m not even sure anymore that there is ever an end. I used to think death was the end, but I feel I have died once already, when the shark swallowed me. Yet here I stand.”
“Oh, that was not death,” the Hermit cast the notion aside with pure mirth. “That was just a trick of the eyes. But it did play a role in your evolution. To face the fear of death and return. But a little secret: you are right, there is no real death. For even what you call death is merely a transition to what’s next.”
“And what’s next?” I had to ask.
“Aha, that is a good question from those who yet dwell in the realm of the living. Indeed it is the most-know question of the ages,” the Hermit laughed again. “But the answer is a big one, in some ways, and you will not need to worry about it at this time. Though I think you can begin to understand some of that answer on your own by now. Can you not?”
“I suppose I can,” I said. “I suppose death is just a continuation of a soul’s journey through all the possibilities that creation can offer.”
“I couldn’t have said it better!” applauded the Hermit. “Now, you faced many fears to get to this moment. We applaud you. But I have one final question for you: what is the greatest fear you still hold?”
“
What indeed? Find out in the exciting conclusion to this Epic Adventure!
Thanks so much for reading.
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Blessings to you,
Matthew