EA#41:
Read From the Beginning or the start of Trial Two or Three or Four or Five or Six
The Mountain in the Clouds, Part Forty-Four
“
“Magi Man,” said a big voice.
Gumpelthwomp stood above me.
I looked up at him.
His face was full of concern.
“What happened?” the giant asked me. “You look like you saw a demon.”
“I think I did,” I replied. “Gumpelthwomp, can I ask you something.”
“Yes,” said he.
“What is it you fear most?”
“Gumpel fear nothing,” the giant answered. Then he furrowed his brow and crinkled his face. “No, Gumpel afraid of one thing. Gumpel afraid something happen to Giggazibar. That maybe Gumpel never see her again, and tell her how Gumpel feel.”
I nodded knowingly. “Right, it’s decided then. We have one more thing to do, my friend. We have to find the ones we love.”
Just then we were joined by the others. Riley, Gill and Apalandro were first among them, followed by King Garamund, Evenhand and Etl Drilksbat himself.
Etl spoke first, “I must offer my sincere apology. I am the cause of this mess, all this war and strife. I do not know what came over me. I suddenly feel so free. And I look back at my life as if it were another life, as though I were another person altogether. I cannot understand it. But I hear you might have had something to do with this, great Magi. Is this true? For that I am eternally grateful.”
The man knelt to one knee before me and bowed his head. I was taken aback, and I saw Gill stifling a laugh.
“Uh, yea, I suppose you could say that,” I offered. “I saw a vision in which all present were at peace, and so it came to be an option. But it was you who dropped your weapons. It was all of you who stopped fighting. You should honor your own choice to do so. I held the field, but you agreed to join the energy of peace.”
“Well said, Great Magi,” King Garamund smiled at me. “And thank you for all your wonderful efforts. This is truly remarkable. The Barrow Lands surely will never forget you, nor will I and the people of Castle Greene, who so benefited from your healing as well. You are truly a master.”
Then Garamund bowed as well. After a respectful pause, he and Drilksbat stood up again.
Evenhand was next. “I must admit, the first time I saw you, I thought you were weak. I had no idea the true power you possessed. You have taught me much, namely not to underestimate someone for what they may be capable of. But you have also shown me true deliverance from the wicked ways in which I lived. I am a changed man, fully, because of you.”
“Again,” I replied to him, “I must remind you that I was only a catalyst. It was still your choice to go along. It was your own ability to make a new choice in your actions. You may call your old ways wicked, but they were not. They may have been misguided, but they were choices you made for reasons you once had. Now you have new reasons to make different choices. And I hope you continue to make ones that help, and not harm, those around you.”
“Wise words, Magi, thank you,” said Evenhand, bowing a step back.
“Troy!” Gill couldn’t contain her enthusiasm any longer. She ran up to me and gave a warm, contented hug. “I’m so glad you’re ok. Hell, I’m glad I’m ok. Haha. It was looking really bad there. I still can’t believe it’s over. I can’t even believe HOW it came to end. How did it happen, again?” She had a puzzled expression.
Corporal Riley intervened, “Please, give him some space. The man has been busy ending a major war here today.” She wore a cunning grin.
Gill continued to wonder, but no more was said on the matter. I honestly didn’t even know how to explain it to her, even if I had tried. Perhaps in how I have explained it to you, it will have made sense. Perhaps not. It is now your choice in how you perceive it.
Apalandro was last. He sauntered up to me with a cocky look on his face.
“Well a, we now a know who is the most proficient a warrior,” he said. “I may a fight a well, but you a end a war single handedly.” He winked and patted me on the back.
What is it you fear most? a voice intoned inside.
I couldn’t make out if it was that voice I heard, the one from beyond me, or if it was simply the echo of my own words from earlier.
Does it matter?
It gets to a point that you wonder if the voice in your head is really yours at all. Or if it ever was.
What do you think?
I just want to know what’s next.
So you fear the unknown?
Doesn’t everyone fear the unknown? I mean, we like to be in control of our destiny, our life, what happens next…
But are you really in control?
Yes. I think so.
That is the problem. You think far too much. What would happen if you stopped thinking?
I… I don’t really know.
Ah, but you would know. That is the paradox, in a way. If you are not thinking something, than you are knowing something.
Ok. I guess I can understand that.
So what do you think you are afraid of?
Death. I would say death.
Do you think that? Or do you know you are afraid of that?
I know I am afraid of death.
Is that so? Are you really afraid, or just because you have been taught to fear death? What is death, even? Do you know? Perhaps, is there something you fear more than death itself?
I don’t understand. What’s there to fear more than death?
“Hello!” Gill was waving her hand before my eyes. “Where’d you go?”
I snapped out of my inner dialogue. “Um, I’m sorry. You know, I’ve actually got something that I need to take care of. It’s urgent. I’m glad I could catch up with everyone here. But I’ll have to see you again when I’m done with this.”
“So sudden. What is it?” Gill asked.
“I’ll explain later. I just need to go now.” I knew I was being abrupt, but the calling to follow my guidance was just too much. And I felt just too close to something big, profound. I knew that my task of ascension was in its last stage, and I was ready to complete it.
“Gumpel, can you lend me your great stride?” I asked.
The giant smiled warmly and winked, “Yes, let’s go get them.”
He lifted me again in his enormous hand, and carried me above my confused friends, walking me out of the barrow lands and away from the armies of light and dark that had now made peace.
We walked for some time in that open plain, with the cliff wall following us all the while to our south.
It seemed endless, that great land. Miles of grass and small shrubs, little rodents and snakes, the occasional family of deer in the distance, a handful of birds, mostly vultures.
And it was quiet.
And while I hadn’t noticed the weather before, I suddenly became acutely aware of the temperature. I found that as we walked the air got more and more frigid. My breath came heavier, with a visible exhale of cloudy white. It even felt as though the land were becoming frosted, even my hands and face.
“Stop, Gumpelthwomp!” I shouted. “Where are you taking us?”
“We keep walking,” he said sheepishly. “Gumpel go where feet take me.”
“Ok, has it ever occurred to you that we don’t even know where Giggazibar or Maniea are? And we just keep moving to some unknown place?” I queried.
“You do it with me, Magi Man,” the giant smartly said.
He was right. I had gone along, not thinking this through. I was so hopeful, not considering anything, just acting. Somehow I thought, like most things in this trial, I would just stumble into the next step. But it was only when the land changed, and the air so cold, that I began to worry.
And I was fearful. I was afraid that we were going the wrong way. That we were wasting time and energy out here. I was afraid that we didn’t even know where to go. I was worried that we might not ever find those whom we sought. That we would never get a clue.
As I filled my mind with thoughts of worry and doubt, I felt colder every minute. My mind raced through scenarios in which Maniea was hurt, or lost, and needed immediate help. And I had failed her simply because I had let Gumpel walk the wrong way, and that when we finally found her it was too late.
I worried that she would not know who I am, would not remember me after all this time, would not still love me. Maybe even worse, that she would hate me for how her life had turned out because of me.
And the sky grew more grey, the land more blue.
It wasn’t until the snow had already begun to accumulate on the ground that I even noticed the flakes grazing the skin of my face. I had been lost in thought, ignoring the moment in which I stood.
It was like I woke up from a dream, and I realized that we were in a place of danger. Not danger like that war we’d left behind. But danger that the elements themselves presented.
“Gumpel, wake up!” I shouted.
“Gumpel awake!” he cried back.
“Get us out of here! It’s getting too cold. There’s a snow storm heading this way. We’ll be swallowed in it.” I tried desperately to speak. But the more I tried, the more it seemed my voice was caught. As if the cold air was freezing my vocal chords, preventing any noise from escaping. That, or the increasing winds made it impossible to hear me. Like the howl of cold seized the sound of my voice and carried it off into nothingness.
Gumpelthwomp didn’t hear me. Or he couldn’t. Oh he didn’t want to. Maybe his mind had grown fuzzy and impaired in the cold. I’m not sure how giants respond to winter. But he didn’t budge. In fact he sat down in the snow.
NO! I tried to say. But only my thoughts screamed, not my mouth.
Why won’t my lips move? Why can’t I speak?
Please, help!
It’s too cold!
Then, like Gumpel, my giant friend, I too succumbed to the cold.
I gave up.
I couldn’t think.
I sat down.
I closed my eyes.
I let go.
“
Thanks so much for reading.
Please leave comments and share.
Blessings to you,
Matthew